How Governments Could Be Playing the Ultimate Bitcoin Pump and Dump Game

Alright this one is going to be a little bit dirtier than your dog rolling in mud folks - if you think I am not being serious, you should probably take a little dig around the Shmoogle Search and go figure - because we're about to go sneaking around a bit of a pit of vipers, and a 'theory' of government spending shenanigans with everyone's favorite Cryptocurrency... Bitcoin.

Now, please, before you start throwing Dogecoin at me... you might want to think Bitcoin is all about decentralization and sticking it to the big man (not Joe this time, well yes maybe Joe also... definitely Joe). For a moment there, you were once correct... but what if I told you that the man might just be hoarding and screwing with Bitcoin behind your back?

Conspiracy theory this for me... while you're busy hodling and praying for those sweet, sweet gains, your friendly neighborhood government is quietly accumulating Bitcoin like the scripts of lies it issues to mainstream media, or scream like clowns in big buildings... but why, you ask? Well it is reasonable to contemplate when you pull back the curtains... you see it is because they're playing the ultimate game of pump and dump, and it could be carnage... it's bleeding obvious, and it is bleeding large, but largely blinking unnoticed amounts of Tax revenue - and Bitcoin... apparently... Well they are not going to be using their own wages those dastardly politicians are they now?

Think about this without blowing your mind - but with all that power, and resources at their disposal, governments could easily manipulate the price of Bitcoin to their advantage. They could pump it up to astronomical heights, causing FOMO among unsuspecting investors, only to pull the rug out from under them and watch the price plummet faster than my hopes of ever understanding quantum physics.


But wait if you think it does not get worse... it gets even crazier than a Joe Biden speech. When the price inevitably crashes, guess who swoops in to scoop up all that cheap Bitcoin? You got it - the same governments that orchestrated the whole scheme in the first place. It's like Robin Hood in reverse, stealing from the poor and giving to... well, themselves... and where is it all? I know we like privacy in the crypto world - but should there be full and factual transparency with the public, and not filed in the 'make it hard to find' boxes under some large government building somewhere? It's probably with the huge UFO stash!

So my Sherlocky sleuths... you might be wondering how we know all this 'top secret' info... Hmmmm you could just say a little birdie whispered in my ear and left a trail of breadcrumbs leading straight to the government vaults... via a source. And based on the latest intel from 2023 to 2024, it seems like certain Western governments are the main players in this crypto charade.

According to this almost 'top secret' data... that may or may not have been leaked by a disgruntled intern somewhere - the top five countries hoarding Bitcoin in 2024 are... and probably unsurprisingly, the usual suspects - With that you should factor in the non-declarations of China and Russia, which together could be larger than the pots of the top three added together, which is probably not far off speculation.
The top five Bitcoin hoarding governmenst as almost but not quite fully disclosed, are below... where are SEC now?  


1. United States: Approximately 150,000 BTC
2. United Kingdom: Around 75,000 BTC
3. Germany: Roughly 50,000 BTC
4. Canada: About 30,000 BTC
5. Australia: Close to 20,000 BTC
Now... I don't know about you, but those numbers seem suspiciously high for countries that claim to have spoken about having absolutely no interest in this whole Bitcoin thing. A bit hypocritical or criminally genius of those governments that have looked to hurt the growth of Cryptocurrency with the likes of The US Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) - It's like finding out your grandma has been secretly running an underground TikTok account - unexpected, not right and yet oddly intriguing.

But here's the kick in the snoodlies... all that Bitcoin sitting in government treasuries? Yeah, that's basically owned by you and me, the taxpayers. Because let's face it, where do you think governments get all the rest of their fancy toys and secret underground lairs from? That's right, our hard-earned tax bills... paid...
So, the real question is should be, how much revenue are these governments raking in from their shady Bitcoin dealings? And more importantly, how much are we, the taxpayers, losing in the process? It's a mystery worthy of Sherlock Holmes himself, or at least his less successful cousin Wensley Thursday who dabbles in crypto conspiracies.


But hey Pipkins... don't take my word for it. Do some digging of your own and see what you uncover. Who knows you might just stumble upon the biggest government scandal since last weekend - Or maybe you'll just find a bunch of cat videos. Either way, it's worth a shot, right? Happy hunting, fellow truth seekers.