7 Things I Wish I Knew at 21

Learn these things now and you’ll be a much better person because of it.

#1. Your life really is up to you.

Dreams won’t simply ‘fall into place’. Rather, you’ll need to make a concerted effort to work towards what you want to achieve. Want to go overseas? That trip isn’t going to book itself. Want to work in a dream job? Time to get busy learning new skills so you can become more employable. Your life really is up to you which is daunting… but liberating.

#2. Sometimes the best things really are unplanned.

When I think back, I realise that the best things that ever happened to me were the ones I didn’t plan for. From new friends, to new countries, to new food – Sometimes the best things in life are the ones that simply ‘show up’ unexpected. You just need to be ready to take these opportunities when they arise.

#3. Young people don’t know as much as they think they do.

When I was younger, I had false ideals about my own competence. It all fell away when I had earth-shattering moments that destroyed my confidence. This is not a bad thing; I really think everyone needs to get knocked on their ass every once in a while. It keeps you humble and thirsty to learn more.

#4. Talk to people older than you.

Contrary to contemporary 21st century thinking in the West, Gen X’ers and Baby Boomers aren’t just ‘old people’ destined for the broom cupboard. They have wisdom and experience in so many different things. Talk to them. Learn from them. Humbly accept your own limitations and understand someone else’s point of view.

In fact, I think it was Aristotle (or some other great philosopher) who said to beware the cult of ‘youth’. Young people are great, but sometimes they really do need an older person to give them perspective.

#5. You don’t have to be ‘exceptional’ at everything.

Moving through life, I’ve realised that you really don’t need to be the best and brightest to have a good life. Settle for ‘good’, for ‘moral’, for the unspectacular if you wish. Just focus on being ‘competent’ and having a balanced life with friends, family and work. You don’t need the burden of being number 1 or close to the top.

But if you want to be the best at everything, go for it.

#6. Don’t assume that all ‘hard’ things are worth doing.

Sometimes we believe that we need to do the ‘hard’ things. When I was 21, I believed I needed to enter highly competitive job markets, to submit countless resumes for countless internships. Now, I have learnt that you don’t need to do all the ‘hard’ things because that’s what everyone else is doing. I can still have an amazing career doing things that aren’t as glamorous or hard to get into.

Just do something that feeds your soul; that’s all that matters.

#7. Persevere… and don’t be a flake.

It’s quite tempting to quit on things when they get hard. Learn to persevere. Set 2-3 year timeframes and let life slow down for you. Focus on one thing at a time. The best thing to do is to simply put one foot in front of the other and to learn slowly.

The worst thing you can do is chop and change. It prevents you from deeply learning new skills, and more importantly, from learning how to be accountable for your work. Don’t be a flake; it ruins your character.