Alien

Alien 
This feeling called happiness 
I have tasted it, I have drowned in it 
I have lived knowing I deserve it 
I want it back 
I might not be the best person there is, but I know I am always available for my people. 
I set out this month with the intent to breathe, merely on survival skills, something austere. 
This month was really a month of hard knocks, I was broken from my heart to my soul and my mind. 
The worst experience so far, I definitely need therapy 
when my mind moved in slow motion, completely undone 
when I felt ripped of my dignity by a random girl whose intent was self serving and hatred 
when someone I used to know broke me completely 
in a space of a day 
so many things I would have done, but I ended up screaming that night 
the pain was unbearable 
a jump off a cliff would not have hurt that bad.