The Cost of Being Different

If you are lucky enough to be weird, don’t change
I was born and raised from a simple family with simple life. My father was a lecturer and my mother was a high-school teacher. Judged by their profession, I will say that both of them are well-educated.
And I think for that reason, they know the importance of education and wanted their children to have even better education. And like every parents do, they want their children to be more successful than they are.
Is being a “good boy” a good thing?
From the very young age, I was taught that it is good to be a “good boy”. But what does it mean by being a good boy?
You might be already know if it means:
Being good at math and science,
Being calm and polite,
Being honest,
Etc
To be fair, none of those things are bad things. That’s why I also agree that it’s important to be a “good boy”.
Most people around me would think if I am somewhere inside the “good boy” spectrum. Well, my enemies would not be agree though. And most of the times, I become my own enemy. But let’s get through it later.
To be honest, I never consider myself as a good boy (read: smart, polite, etc) nor feel very proud of it.
Then if I were asked — so why do I keep doing those “good boy” things — , I would most likely answer: Because this value has already been taught to me since I was young, and I haven’t found anything bad on it.
Then if I were asked — so why do I keep doing those “good boy” things — , I would most likely answer: Because this value has already been taught to me since I was young, and I haven’t found anything bad on it.
Had I found something bad, I would have probably challenged myself too.
Being good is not always good
Being good is no guarantee of success — whatever the meaning it could be. In the other hand, it’s very dangerous to think this way, in my opinion.
Let’s have this example: If you mean success is having a lot of money, then a drug lord that owns a lot of wealth by smuggling narcotics is considered success. Do you think drug lord is a good boy? Can you be like that?
Or, if you mean success is having a high grade in school, then a cheater with a high grade is also considered success. But, do you think good boy cheats?
You understand where I am about to go with this right?
That was the most important lesson that I learned in my late 20s several years ago. It’s good to be good, but that’s not enough. Sometimes, a good thing is not necessarily good. And it also applies to the “bad guy”. Sometimes, what people considers as “bad” is not necessarily a bad thing.
Good and bad mostly depend on the society where you live. It’s rarely about truth. And in most cases I know, you will need a combination of “good” and “bad” to be success — whatever the meaning it could be.
Being different is being yourself
From my family background, education might be the best privilege I had back then. From my previous writing, I believe that we should think of being educated rather than merely being schooled.
However in my case, being schooled is important because it gives me the foundation of reasoning and being critical, which is one of the most overlooked value.
Without a proper education, I might be still wandering around until now, doing something I never meant to do, just because I don’t know what I want and just follow other people — whatever it is.
I might be somewhere in the street, without home, entertaining people with my guitar and poetic song that I wrote myself. Is it a bad thing? Well, for most people it’s maybe a bad profession. However, in my opinion, there’s nothing wrong with it.
Or in the other hand, I might become very successful and making a lot of money (Let’s say by becoming an influencer, or selling daily products at my own store, or pursuing political career, etc). There’s nothing wrong with that too.
Everyone is wired differently, and being different doesn’t mean you’re wrong. Well, unless you harm other people and breaking the law.
The cost of being different is actually being different itself
Sometimes, people just won’t understand your journey and they might think you’re weird. In this situation, it’s easy to forget that it is actually okay to be different and instead we try to be someone else in order to be accepted and understood. This is the most common pitfall of being different.
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
On top of that, being different doesn’t mean you don’t listen to other people that is different that you (well, unless you expect a world in a complete silence! ;). Being different is to embrace yourself and accept the differences of others.