Difference Between Love & Attachment !
Hello friends, love is probably not what you think and it is called attachment. If you want to know what is the difference between love and attachment, then read this blog further.
What is Love and Attachment in Actual?
What we call love, that we have great love for our children, is that actually love?
First of all, we need to know what is love and what is attachment?
Attachment means that I am the mother/father of that child, you have to keep feeding her. She is full, but we are trying to force feed her more, and we think it is good for the baby.
You wonder if it's really that good!!!
If we inculcate the habit of overeating in our children from now on, then that child will keep crying for the rest of his life. That poor guy got trapped.
It is a habit to eat more than what one is hungry for. Even if you eat for taste, it's okay, mom has made it tasty, so it's okay, eat it... He is trapped, isn't he?
What happens in attachment is that we always want to do what feels right to us, what we like with that person.
Very few people reach even the right here, there is a lot of difference between right and good.
We enjoy doing it - Here good means we enjoy doing that work. It feels good that the child is crying, screaming, shouting that I want this toy, I want it...
So we feel bad seeing the child crying, so what do we tell him at that time that you have taken two toys, take the third one too.
So the child started laughing, we became happy.
Are most of the things we are doing wrong?
We liked it, but do you think, is it right for that child? No no...and we didn't even think like this.
So now we need to know what to actually do there - that you have to see what's right for that child.
What is right - that he should understand that if we ever go to a toy shop in a mall and want to buy a toy, it means that you will get only one toy.
So what will happen now is that he will understand that my words are not accepted by my crying, screaming and yelling. It's perfect for that child.
But we are unable to reach this truth. For this, what we need is that we need a lot of patience to see that thing.
So love has to be brought forward in this, that means love has to be understood, love gives us patience.
Attachment makes us impatient.
How important is patience?
For example, the child had a fight with someone, he came and said anything to you, you do not know whether it is your child's fault or the other child's fault. And you arrived to fight.
So what have you become? You have become impatient.
Because of what - What you are calling love is actually attachment.
If you fall in love, what will you do? With patience, you will first understand the whole situation, that is, you will understand what is actually happening, not that your reaction is triggered by hearing the feelings happening inside you, and you You will react.
So you will not react, you will respond. When can we do this – when we actually love that child.
We say that we love the child, actually we love ourselves. Because hugging a child is a great pleasure, it is a wonderful feeling. So you must be feeling that I am in love with that child.
It is possible that the child is getting irritated. Did you understand the difference between the two... Attachment and Love?
What is attachment? They caught hold of the child, tousled his hair and took him as a puppy. Everyone does this.
Just imagine how you would feel if someone did this to you!!!! This is the condition of children.
This is attachment, this is not love. What is the meaning of love? How is that child feeling?
What is the meaning of love in actual?
If you actually love that child, you will always do that.
1. In which there is happiness of that child.
2. What's right for him.
If you have to choose between these two, then you have to do what is right for the child. Because he can be happy even in his wrong things.
If every parent in India understands this attachment and love well, then children in India will never commit suicide.
Most of the 15-17 year old children who commit suicide do so because of this attachment to their parents. It doesn't feel good to hear but this is the truth.
Conclusion
We compare the children and because of this comparison, if the child gets less marks in school or even if the child is good in studies, we put pressure on him to be better in memorizing, this is not because of love but because of attachment. From. If there was love, the parents would have told the child that you are whatever you are but you are unique, you are never less than or greater than anyone. He would say some motivational things like this, but no, if my child has not done this because of attachment, then how will I show my face in front of that child's mother. And because of this, children are mentally tortured day and night by their parents.
So you don't have to do this... What will happen if he gets 20 marks more than a child in school today, then in future he will get a job somewhere else... So don't get attached to the child. Love me.
If you love your child then why not make him such that he can acquire knowledge and not just memorize. So that they can take life forward happily with positive thoughts and without mental pressure...
So you have to understand Love and Attachment well… only then we will be able to bring happiness in our life.
THANK YOU !
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